Practicing Gratitude Benefits Story Writing
Practicing Gratitude Benefits Story Writing
But not in the way you think
The Story Writer’s Path
But not in the way you think
You’ve probably heard a lot about gratitude and how good it is for you. So much so that the thought of reading one more article about it makes you want to run, screaming, from your computer. (Thanks for clicking on this post anyway.)
But what if I told you that gratitude is not only good for you, it’s good for your writing? That practicing it can actually improve your writing? Then might you be interested?
I thought so. And I believe that gratitude can, indeed, improve your writing — if practiced in a certain way. But I’ll get to that in a minute. First, I want to tell you a personal story, and then take a look at some of the ways gratitude has been shown to be of proven scientific benefit.
My gratitude story
Last September, I sat on the terrace of a lovely home in a small town in France, where I regularly lead writing workshops. I was working on a couple of self-help exercises from a book I was reading, Everything is Figureoutable by Marie Forleo. (I’m an insatiable self-help book junkie, even though I rarely end up finishing them — which is alas also the case with this one. Maybe I ought to go back to it.)
The exercise was in two parts. In the first part, you were to write down all the things that were wrong with your life and what you wanted to change — why you picked up the book. In the second part, your task was to take the other side. Litigate it. Tell all the reasons why the first part wasn’t true.
So I wrote down the usual suspects. I wanted to lose weight. I wanted to exercise more. I wanted to write more. I wanted a best-selling novel. I wanted a more cohesive social media plan. To write more articles for Medium. I wanted to earn more money. I complained about how mediocre my career was at its current level. And on and on.
Then came the time to write why this was all bull. I started in: I’m sitting on a terrace in the south of France. This is my fourth week here. I’ve taught two amazing writing workshops with fabulous students. Every day I walk into and around the town and every night I eat amazing cheese and bread and drink great wine. I’m with close friends and I’m making new friends. My husband is here. And, I do this every year.
Um, hello?
Revelatory. I had so many fabulous things going on in my life and yet I was complaining? It was at that moment that I got, truly got from the top of my head to the tips of my toes, what it was like to feel gratitude. And, also, why it was so important. Because when I embodied gratitude it enabled me to move outward to embrace all those other thing I wanted, too. Starting from where I was, in a grounded, centered way, which is much better than a grasping, desperate way.
So that was a great experience. But it’s only been recently that I’ve discovered a way that practicing gratitude — writing down what you’re thankful for — can actually improve your writing.
But let’s look at the scientific benefits to gratitude of particular interest to writers.
Benefits of gratitude to writers
There are lots of documented scientific reasons to practice thankfulness, including that it positively affects your physical health, improves relationships, and decreases aggression and increases empathy. Those are all great, but there are three other benefits for writers.
Psychological health
Robert Emmons is a leading gratitude researcher, and he has ascertained that gratitude reduces toxic emotions such as envy, resentment, regret, and so on. He’s found that it reduces depression and increases happiness.
I don’t know about you, but I write much better when I’m happy and free of negative emotions. I know, I know, there’s the old myth of the frustrated and unhappy writer putting his angst on the page, but it doesn’t work that way for me. So anything that promises to make me happier will also positively impact my writing, and I’m all for it.
Better sleep
According to a 2011 study in Applied Psychology: Health and Wellbeing, taking a few minutes before bed to write down what you’re thankful for can help you to sleep better and longer. Again, I’m not a good writer when I’m yawning and my eyes are drooping as I stare at the computer. A good night’s sleep is a wonderful thing, and key to many positive things, including writing.
Higher self-esteem
Is there a writer on the planet who doesn’t struggle with issues of self-worth? Well, okay, maybe Stephen King. Or Nora Roberts. But for most of us, low self-esteem plagues us. We wring our hands repeatedly over whether or not our writing is good enough. And the truth is, I’ve seen excellent writers quit writing because they felt they weren’t good enough. Which in my book is a tragedy.
Studies have shown that gratitude reduces the way we compare ourselves to each other, which in turn reduces envy and resentment of those who we perceive to have more. (Such as, just maybe, a best-selling novel?) Grateful people are happy for the successes of their writing friends, not jealous.
Another study showed that athletes who practiced gratitude had higher self-esteem. So all the way around, it’s a good idea.
How gratitude makes you a better writer
Okay, so now we get to the meat of it — how does the practice of thankfulness make you a better writer?
Here’s why: because in writing down what you’re grateful for, you’ll reach a point where the usual blah blah blah doesn’t do it anymore. Yes, I’m grateful for my family, my friends, my home, etc., but those are the basics. And when I focus only on these superficial aspects of life, I get bored.
So if you’re noting them down day after day, it’s time to go deeper. Which will benefit your gratitude practice and your writing.
Because when you dig deep into what you’re thankful for, you’re going to start coming up with some details. So, not, I’m grateful for my house, but, I’m grateful for how welcoming the bright yellow door on my house is when I arrive home. Or not, I’m grateful for my husband, but, I’m grateful for how my husband’s face completely changes when he smiles and his eyes crinkle and his dimples show.
This kind of gratitude practice makes you pay attention. Observe. And then find the detail that makes your thankfulness come alive. And guess what? You can — and should — transfer this to the page. The story-writing page.
The devil is in the details — and so is the story. Not, tree, but elm. Not car, but SUV. Specificity brings the world of your story alive. And when you use specific details, you don’t have to use as many of them. You don’t have to write page after page of description because your details have nailed it already.
And you are getting excellent practice in the art of doing this as you practice gratitude.
How to do it
There are five million ways to give thanks, but obviously writing them down is key here. (Though it can be fun when stuck in traffic or a line at the post office to practice observing details and thinking about what you’re grateful for. Better than fuming.)
Here are some suggestions:
Add a gratitude practice to a regular journaling session if you already have one. Think back over your day, and what you did. Then write down your gratitudes. And from there, go deeper. Really drill down into what made that thing special to you.
Make notes on your phone throughout the day. These can be just joggers so that you’ll remember later, or full-on detailed scrawlings.
Keep a journal dedicated solely to gratitude and set up a time in the evening or first thing in the morning to write in it.
I hope you start practicing the art of gratitude and notice how different it makes you feel — in life and your writing!