Can You Handle Their Judgment?
Can You Handle Their Judgment?
How to take critiques of your writing
How to take critiques of your writing
Picture this: a room on a college campus, a dozen people sitting around a table. Eleven of those people are talking, some excitedly, some with dour looks on their face. The twelfth person sits silently, taking notes, mostly staring down at the papers in front of her on the table. When she does look up, she has that deer-caught-in-the-headlights appearance.
What’s going on here?
It’s a writing workshop.
And anybody who has ever been in one, whether on a college campus or a privately organized critique group, knows how the twelfth person feels.
As if her very life is on the line.
Why put yourself through this?
It can be hard to take criticism of your work, even the most well-meaning and helpful. That’s your baby they are talking about. And they’re suggesting you change it? When you’ve poured all your love and care into it? Can’t they, like you, see it’s perfect?
Well, no, they can’t. Because it’s not. Only you can’t see that because you are too close to it. Which is why you need other eyes on your work. To grow and prosper as a writer, to publish successfully, whether you go the indie or traditional routes, you need to get other eyes on your work.
There are many ways to do this, including joining a critique group, hiring an editor, going for your MFA, establishing a critique partnership, and finding beta readers when your manuscript is finished. And once you’ve done this, sooner or later the time comes. It’s your turn to sit in the spotlight.
Which might be uncomfortable. Really uncomfortable.
But you can do it, I promise! Here are some tips to help.
Make sure you are in the correct situation
In other words, take care to find the right writing group or critique partner. Not all situations work for all writers. A case in point: a woman in the group I lead is writing a story about a rape in the military. Several years ago, she landed in an all-male group who refused to believe that the rape was credible. (Never mind that it was based on a true story.) Their scorn caused her to quit writing for years. (And I like to think that their response would be different today.)
Clearly, that wasn’t the right group for her. Before you commit to a group, a class, or a partnership, ask some questions. Find out who else will be in the group and what their experience is. Figure out, if you can, the leader’s style — is she gentle and supportive, or direct and take-no-prisoners? Or somewhere in between? Ask yourself what style will work best for you and most importantly, your writing. Maybe you don’t need the kind and gentle approach, but if something stronger is going to keep you from writing, then maybe you do.
In the right kind of critiquing situation, you may take a few lumps, but overall you should emerge feeling excited to revise your work and energized about writing. If that isn’t happening, keep looking.
Remind yourself that it’s for the benefit of your writing
In other words, don’t take it personally. Because it isn’t personal. Yes, I know, it feels like it is, because your writing is so much a part of you. But it isn’t. Your story has a life of its own and exists separately from you. And you are participating in the critiquing process in order to make sure that what you think you’ve put on the page is the same thing that readers are getting when they read your words. Beyond that, the ultimate goal is to get this baby out into the world — and the critique process is an integral part of that goal.
Listen
Many MFA programs have a rule for writing workshops: the writer being critiqued must remain silent until the discussion of her work is finished. This can be very difficult, but it’s a rule put in place for a reason. Too many writers argue, defend, and explain when their work is being discussed.
Don’t do that. It’s only wasting valuable time you could be learning how your story isn’t working — and how it is, as well.
And should you be in a group without this rule (we don’t do this in the group I lead), please do your best not to argue, defend, or explain. Listen respectfully to what the others have to say. You may not agree with their comments, but keep an open mind.
Learn to Discern
If you’re in a group or a workshop, you may find you resonate with the comments of several people over others. And that’s fine — it’s discernment. Which is something you need to learn. You aren’t beholden to take every comment from every writer in the group. Some advice may make wonderful sense to you, other criticisms, not so much.
Once, in a critique group I was in, the hive mind decided I needed to rework the opening of my novel. (The first line of which I still love more than any other I’ve written.) Because I hadn’t yet fully learned the art of discernment, I listened and revised it. When I took the rewrite in to the next meeting, they were horrified. “Why did you change the first line? We loved it!” Classic.
Do be aware, though, that sometimes the advice you think is terrible may be the exact thing your story needs. After you leave the group and think about you may realize this. Or what often happens is the advice isn’t quite right, but it alerts you to a place in the story that isn’t working.
Which is, I will remind you, why you need to keep an open mind about all comments.
Know it Gets Easier
The first time I submitted my work to a critique group I could barely force myself to walk into the office where we were going to meet. I was terrified. Since then I’ve been in numerous critique groups, two years of MFA workshops, and submitted my work to beta readers. In other words, I have a lot of experience with having my work read by others.
And it gets easier with experience. It gets easier to understand that your critiquers have your writing’s best interest at heart and they aren’t just tearing your work apart for fun. (With a few exceptions, but they are unusual, in my experience.) It gets easier to de-personalize the writing and take criticism more objectively.
So go forth and find yourself somebody to read your work. One more tip here — the best person to read your work is likely not going to be a beloved husband or daughter or other family member. They are too close to you and too worried about hurting your feelings to tell you the truth.
Good luck with your critiques!